Remember the good people and forget the rest
Coaching and playing hockey has exposed me to a tremendous variety of people. Some have become lifelong friends, and others are angry, despicable individuals, with the rest in between. To stay involved in hockey for a long time it is critically important to remember the good people, and forget the bad.
I made a mistake 25 years ago by letting a parent drive me out of coaching with his constant harassment, badgering, bad language, screaming at kids, and general foul disposition. I was young at the time and because of this person I quit coaching for 8 years. There were 30 great parents on that team, but this one person was so bad I quit after the season. These ridiculous individuals are the ones who need to leave, not the good ones. This will never happen again to me, and don't let it happen to you.
I try to get along with everyone I meet as a coach, and explain my philosophy, and be reasonable. I treat everyone with respect and expect the same respect in return. However, if somebody insists on being a jerk, and my efforts to change them have failed, I will confront them head on. I try not to punish the player for the sins of the parent, however, if the parent continues harassing people I will ban the parent from the rink. If this forces them to remove their player from the team, so be it. The only other choice is to allow the jerk to become a cancer on the team and ruin a season.
The good people in hockey have to drive the bad people out, not the other way around. This is a critical lesson for all. The jerks need to be confronted and removed. There are so many nice people, but the jerks are so loud they often overwhelm them. Don't let the jerks win.
To all of you out there who do so much for so many kids, I thank you. Don't let the few bad people you encounter drive you out. Focus on those great kids you find, the helpful parents, the sponsors who give so willingly. Spend more time with these wonderful kids and adults, and deal with the bad people as quickly and efficiently as possible. But beware - it seems that more often the jerks win and drive the good people out. The jerks can be so intense, so irritating, so evil, that it requires an enormous effort to fend them off. Hopefully if you remember those good kids and people you can use that as fuel to overcome the problems. There is nothing more important to youth hockey than to keep the good people involved.